Simone Lawson
There are several viewpoints on what constitutes a marriage in God's eyes. Some believe that a man and a woman are married in God's eyes when they have completed some kind of formal wedding ceremony involving covenantal vows. Others argue that God only considers a man and a woman married when they are legally married and recognized by the government. A third viewpoint suggests that God considers a man and a woman to be married at the moment they engage in sexual intercourse, fulfilling the 'one flesh' principle. Ultimately, a valid marriage in God's eyes is one where God is present and enters into the marriage, making it a lifelong commitment that cannot be broken.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Ceremony | A formal wedding ceremony is required. |
| Covenant | A promise to abide together for life. |
| Consummation | Sexual intimacy is the final seal on a marriage covenant. |
| Vows | Vows must be unconditional and made in public. |
| Legal recognition | A marriage should be legally recognised by the government. |
| Cultural recognition | Culturally-appropriate actions are required to be recognised as married in some cultures. |
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What You'll Learn
Marriage as a covenant
Marriage is a covenant, a sacred bond between a man and a woman, instituted by and entered into before God. It is a lifetime commitment to each other, a promise to forsake all others and cling only to your covenantal partner. This commitment before God can and should hold marriages together, even when nothing else does.
The Bible describes marriage as a covenant in several places, often sadly, describing those who didn't keep their commitment. For example, in Malachi 2:14, the prophet explains God’s displeasure with his people, “because the Lord is acting as the witness between you and the wife of your youth, because you have broken faith with her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant.”
A covenant is intended to be permanent, until “death do us part”. In contrast, a contract is temporary and typically has a time limit. When someone sees marriage as a contract, they are saying, “I’ll take you as a spouse and see if this relationship works out”. When someone sees marriage as a covenant, they are saying, “I give all of myself to you and I’m committed to this marriage for life”.
A covenant also emphasizes forgiveness, as we enter the agreement realizing we are marrying a sinner, just as God’s covenant of salvation is with us as sinners. It also requires two people to maintain lives of virtue in an effort to maintain a relationship, not just keep the terms of a contract.
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The role of ceremony
In the Bible, there are several references to marriage and wedding ceremonies. For example, in Genesis 2:22, God brings Eve to Adam, which can be interpreted as God overseeing the first wedding ceremony. Additionally, in John chapter 2, Jesus attended a wedding ceremony, indicating his approval of the event. These biblical references suggest that a ceremony is an important part of a marriage in God's eyes.
Throughout history and across cultures, nearly every culture has observed some form of wedding ceremony. This suggests that a ceremony is a fundamental aspect of marriage, providing a public proclamation of the couple's commitment to each other. In many cases, the ceremony includes the exchange of vows, blessings, and covenantal practices that are recognised by the community as a declaration of marriage.
However, it is important to note that the Bible does not explicitly state that a wedding ceremony is required for a marriage to be valid. Some interpretations suggest that a man and a woman are married in God's eyes when they have completed a formal wedding ceremony involving covenantal vows. Others argue that a couple is married in God's eyes when they engage in sexual intercourse, fulfilling the "one flesh" principle found in Genesis 2:24, Matthew 19:5, and Ephesians 5:31.
Ultimately, the role of ceremony in a marriage may vary depending on cultural and personal beliefs. While some may view a ceremony as a crucial public declaration of their commitment, others may consider it a private agreement between the couple. It is essential to respect the diverse interpretations and practices surrounding marriage while upholding the core values of love, commitment, and mutual respect that are central to any enduring union.
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Sexual consummation
There are differing views on what constitutes a marriage in God's eyes. Some sources state that a couple is considered married at the moment they engage in sexual intercourse, or consummate their marriage. This is based on the interpretation of the "one flesh" principle, which is referenced in Genesis 2:24, Matthew 19:5, and Ephesians 5:31. According to this view, sexual intercourse is the final "seal" on a marriage covenant, fulfilling the physical aspect of becoming one flesh.
However, other sources argue that sexual intercourse alone does not constitute a marriage in God's eyes. Instead, they emphasize the importance of legal recognition, cultural and familial practices, and formal wedding ceremonies. These sources believe that sex within the context of marriage is honorable and moral, but sex alone does not create a marriage.
Additionally, there are cultural and traditional aspects to consider. In traditional cultures, consummation may be required for the legality of a marriage. However, this does not necessarily reflect a biblical interpretation.
While there are differing opinions, it is important to note that the Bible does not explicitly state at what exact point God considers a couple to be married. Ultimately, it is between the couple and God, as God knows the intentions and covenants made between them.
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The importance of vows
The Bible establishes marriage as a covenant between one man and one woman, as seen in Genesis 2:24, where God brings Eve to Adam, overseeing the first wedding ceremony. This covenant is a promise of monogamy and a lifelong union, sealed by the exchange of vows. In 1 Corinthians 7 and Hebrews 13:4, we find the importance of monogamy emphasized, further reinforcing the significance of fidelity within the marriage covenant.
The wedding ceremony, including the exchange of vows, is a public declaration of this covenant. While some cultures may have unique traditions or rituals, the presence of a formal ceremony is generally recognized as essential in God's eyes. This ceremony serves as a public witness to the commitment being made, and it is through these vows that the couple enters into a binding agreement.
The vows themselves are not just words but a sacred promise made before God and the community. They are meant to be unconditional, with no exclusions or conditions attached. When a couple vows to love, honor, and cherish each other "till death do us part," they are making a lifelong pledge that transcends any earthly challenges or circumstances.
Furthermore, the vows are a reflection of God's presence in the marriage. As it is said, "What God has joined together, let no man put asunder." God is the glue that holds the marriage together, and it is through their vows that a couple invites God into their union. This divine presence provides the strength and grace needed to uphold their promises, even during difficult times.
In conclusion, the vows exchanged during a wedding ceremony are of utmost importance in a marriage constituted in God's eyes. They are a public declaration of a sacred covenant, a promise of lifelong commitment, and an invitation for God to be the foundation and strength of the union. Through their vows, a couple establishes a bond that is not only between them but also with God, setting the tone for a marriage that honors both their love and their faith.
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Marriage as a public institution
Marriage is a public institution created by God, and a public vow is needed for a marriage to be valid in God's eyes. This means that a private marriage is not a real marriage. If no one knows about the marriage except the couple, it is not authenticated in the eyes of God. There must be witnesses to their vow. This can be a church or a government official, but it must be public because the roles of husband and wife are public roles held within a society, not just within an individual relationship.
In John chapter 2, Jesus attended a wedding ceremony. Jesus would not have attended such an event if he did not approve of what was occurring. His presence at a wedding ceremony indicates that a wedding ceremony is acceptable in God's sight. Nearly every culture in the history of humanity has observed some kind of formal wedding ceremony. In every culture, there is an event, action, covenant, vow, or proclamation that is recognized as declaring a man and woman to be married.
The Bible is clear on the role distinctions in marriage. It is clear that marriage is meant to be a covenant between one man and one woman for life. The first marriage was based on a covenant promise (Genesis 2:24). God established marriage in the beginning. He instituted it in the garden with our first parents, Adam and Eve. The festivities that we find in Scripture would often last for days (Matthew 22) and would ultimately culminate with the vows and the giving of blessings.
Some people believe that a man and a woman are married in God's eyes when they have completed some kind of formal wedding ceremony involving covenantal vows. Others believe that God only considers a man and a woman married when they are legally married—that is, when they become a husband and wife in the eyes of the law. A third viewpoint is that God considers a man and a woman to be married at the moment they engage in sexual intercourse. However, this is not universally accepted. According to the Bible, sex does not make a man and woman married in the eyes of God.
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Frequently asked questions
The three key components of a marriage in God's eyes are ceremony, covenant, and consummation.
A formal wedding ceremony involving covenantal vows is necessary to be considered married in God's eyes.
A covenant is a promise to abide together for life. It is a public vow that is witnessed by the community, whether it be a church or a government official.
Consummation is the final seal on a marriage covenant. It is the physical aspect of the "one flesh" principle.
God is the glue that holds a marriage together. He enters into the marriage and it cannot be broken.
